I’ve had a hard time getting back into writing. Honestly, I can’t recall the last time I genuinely enjoyed writing. It has seriously been that long. Lately, communicating what I have been thinking hasn’t exactly processed from my mind to fingers to keyboard.
Yet, here I am trying to do just that.
I recently read an article: “5 Simple Steps to Drastically Improve Your Writing” – I thought that this quick, simple blurb of words could heal my writers block. Of course, it didn’t. Although, I did take one thing away from it. Writing is meant to make you feel. Something. Anything. Good or bad. I think I’ve had a hard time trying to express my thoughts because I fear being judged or criticized for my words – but it doesn’t matter, no wait, it shouldn’t matter what others think. What matters is that I’m feeling something that I want others relate to as well.
I’ve decided I’d rather write to express, not write to impress.
Cliché, I know. Sorry.
As February approached I spent one last night with two of my roommates from my first semester of Bible College. It was our first time being back with one another in over a month. One really long month. I’m so thankful to have been placed in a room with them my first semester. When I showed up to my dorm that first day I thought: “How in the world am I supposed to live with five other girls?” Thankfully, God knew exactly what He was doing when He arranged our room. He knew I needed a little crazy, so He gave me Abigail. He knew I needed a little strange, so He gave me Marissa. But most of all He knew I needed two friends that would encourage, love, and share their lives with me. Without them last semester I probably wouldn’t have been able to survive.
Dramatic, yes. True? Also, yes.
The night before move in day we stayed up late talking about our lives, catching up on the month we didn’t spend together. We were able to share with one another how God had been working in our hearts and how we hoped to see Him work over the next three months. It’s nice having two friends who are always there to listen, as well as always ready to give advice where it’s needed. I knew I could trust these girls with some of my deepest secrets, and I knew there would be no judgment from either of them. They taught me what it was like to truly have a sister in Christ. The night before the semester started was just the beginning of that rollercoaster I was about to step on to.
February became the book of new beginnings. I was ready for another challenge and fearlessly entered my spring semester. I had plenty of close friends and was looking forward to creating new memories with each of them. Immediately I was blessed with the most amazing dorm – Paige, Kim, Blanca, Hailey, and Rachel are all women of God. Legitimately, these girls have taught me so much. They put up with me, listened to me, shared with me, and truly loved me. The past three months of life with them have been such a complete blessing. I still can’t believe that I got to share this semester with them.
“You will keep Him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because He trusts in you”
The first turn on this rollercoaster of a semester was the passing of our friend, Jeff.
Through a sudden series of events we woke up Thursday morning understanding that Jeff had gone home to be with the Lord. I think the most encouraging aspect of it all was the amount of love and support students poured out into each other. Yes, it was a very difficult time for those who were close, those who were just acquaintances, and those who didn’t even know him. Yet, through it all we were still able to see the Lord’s hand in every variable of it. Like anyone, this made me realize how precious my friends lives are. How important it is to let those who you love know that they are loved too. God’s timing is perfect, and though we may have a hard time trying to understand it we can rest assured that each moment has been prearranged by Him who cares so deeply about us. Though, it is still important to remember that while we are still here we should be doing all that we can to step out and love on those who love us. It’s never easy to lose a friend, but God’s peace allowed many of us to overcome the pain knowing that Jeff is spending eternity with our Father in Heaven.
That was just the very beginning of this whirlwind of a season. As I sat in my room reflecting on the most impactful moments of this semester I could barely comprehend how quickly the past three months blew by.
Quickly after one loop-de-loop came another. Though it wasn’t entirely the same, it still took my stomach for a spin. This time though, it was more of a rush.
A good rush, but a rush nonetheless.